As I mentioned earlier this week, Ralph (my 1 year old beagle) and I go for an early morning walk. On Saturday, we walk at nearby park. Unfortunately, I was extremely busy Thursday morning and was unable to take Ralph for his Thursday morning walk. To make it up to him, I took Ralph riding in my little red Nissan truck. He loves three things in this world; walking, bacon strips and riding in that truck. I'm not sure exactly which order they should be placed as far as priority for him. He is the only one that can answer that question and he isn't talking.

So, about 1PM yesterday, I open the passenger side door of the truck and Ralph flies in like his tail is on fire. He starts his baying like beagles are known to do. He will start clawing at the window to come down. He likes to hang his head out the window so his ears can flap in the wind. He just loves this.

There are many country roads in the northern part of this county in which I live. So, I just usually just take whatever country road that suits me and off we go. As I turned down the chosen country road, I noticed I had forgotten my GPS device for the truck. Cussing my forgetfulness, I considered going back. Ralph almost immediately looked at me as if he could read my mind. So, not wanting to hear his whining, I continue on our journey. I notice there are a lot of cornfields on both sides of the road. So, even if I wanted to turn around, I wouldn't be able to. I sure wasn't going to try and turn around in this road since there are so many curves. As soon as I would try to turn around, I'm sure a school bus or some other vehicle would come zooming around one. However, I never did see another car. Eventually, we came to a fork in the road. I remember Yogi Berra's refrain and took it. We hung a right and continued on. I decided we had gone far enough and decided to pull into where there was a ramp leading to a fence. I turned around, and headed back in the direction I came...or so I thought. I don't know how I did it, but missed the turn at the fork in the road. I kept going until the paved road eventually became a dirt road and dead ended at a cornfield. Bummer. I turned to Ralph and said, "Well, old buddy, we are lost as can be." It didn't seem to bother Ralph.


So, I continue driving, taking lefts and rights back to where we should have come back to the main road to town. No such luck. I looked up at the sun...yep, it was definitely sinking west. I remember the main road was taking me north. I was east of the main road. So, I went down another country road (which had no name) and once again ended up at a cornfield. Now, I'm really mad. Not at Ralph. He was having the time of his life. I was mad at myself for forgetting that valuable GPS I always took on these ventures. So, I just parked there for a moment to contemplate my next move when I noticed the cornfield was parting directly in front of me. Someone was coming through. It was a boy about 15 or 16 who came through and stood looking at me. He came over to the truck, smiled and said, "You lost mister?" I said, "Why...yes...yes, I am." He looked at me and then looked at Ralph. The boy then said, "It's a good thing you are lost. Some folks come up here and go rabbit hunting. We heard your dog baying and thought that was what was happening. My daddy wouldn't be happy if you were doing that." I assured him that was not the case. I just wanted to get out of there. I asked him how could I get back to County Road 47. He said, "Well, you need to back up your truck, hang a left, go about 5 or 6 miles, hang another left, go about 10 miles and that should put you on County Road 47."

I did exactly as he said. True enough, it put me on the road back to civilization once again. I remembered why I never leave home without that GPS; I have a lousy sense of direction. Thursday proved that fact once again to me. It also reminded me of one of my phobias; the fear of being lost. I'll never do that again. And I'm not sure I want to see another cornfield anytime soon either.