8/18/2008

I’m Quite Ashamed of Myself


I think there are some things in which you have no real valid excuse. Like when I got a speeding ticket right before Independence Day this year. I was speeding, plain and simple. I didn’t argue with the officer (try that sometime and see how far it gets you) because he got me. I had no excuse. But, forgetting my late mother’s birthday, on this blog, last Friday is inexcusable.

Mama was born in Ruleville, MS (same place actor Morgan Freeman had a terrible accident recently) on August 15th. Knowing Mama was like so many other women concerning their age, I won’t say the year. I’m not sure how I let it slip past me. I’m still in the recovery stage of my back surgery on July 10th. I have a lot of irons in the fire right now. Still, that’s no excuse to forget to pay homage to someone who meant so much to you. There is no excuse to forget someone who I owe so much, someone who asked so little in return. I have berated myself for this since late Saturday night when it suddenly hit me like a bolt of lightning. I guess my age is truly catching up with me.

Mama passed away from cancer on April 11, 1998, the day before Easter if I remember correctly. It was difficult to get in touch with relatives and friends during that weekend. So, only a few of the people who truly loved her were able to attend the services. I wish she were here now so I could talk to her, if only for a couple of minutes. I sometimes find myself trying to remember how her voice sounded. The only way I can remember now is to focus on the three words I heard her say for 12 years of my life…”Rise and shine.” That meant it was time to get up and get dressed for school. I hated those three words. What I wouldn’t give to hear them from her again.

Happy Birthday Mama!!! We’ll always love you…and thanks…for everything you did for all of us.

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