I had the distinct pleasure of chatting with my X, as in ex-wife, Thursday morning. Actually, we chat on about a monthly basis. I try not to call her or email her. I let her do that. Why? A lot of it has to do with the way our divorce went and the situation that she put me in as a result (see my post “Divorce”). It was a very distressing period in my life.

Unfortunately, I needed her assistance with obtaining my medical records in north Alabama, where she lives and has lived all her life. I lived there with her for one year (2004). I have been trying to get my medical records from my former orthopedic surgeon. He is an excellent physician. His staff leaves a lot to be desired, however. I asked them if they were aware it is perfectly within my rights to request my private medical records. “Of course, of course we know that, sir. You just have to follow proper procedure.” Right. This is where my ex-wife came in to assist me. She probably knows everyone in this small north Alabama town. She exerted her formidable “people I know that can fire you” influence to get those records for me. It’s not the way I would have preferred. But, I need those records to get a pension from the Veteran’s Administration. I just recently discovered I was eligible to receive this money. It’s an extra $1K a month. I wasn’t going to let anything stop me from getting my hands on those records. My X performed admirably in this task.

After thanking her, I asked if there was anything I could do for her. She said no, that she was glad to do it for me. I came very close to asking her the question, the one question I know she doesn’t want me to ask. I am pretty sure she’s seeing someone. It’s just something I have picked up on during conversations since her mother (my ex-mil and a wonderful, wonderful woman she was) passed away back in January. Why she tries to hide it from me, I’m not sure. Her personal life is none of my business, and vice versa. She’s peculiar in that kind of way. Her entire family has always been very secretive about their finances, family matters and the like. But, back to my X…I hope I’m right and she is seeing someone. Yes, there is still some tinges of bitterness over the way our marriage ended. But, I did discover that in order for me to move on with my life, I had to move on past my anger toward her. Today, I realized that she had moved on also. And, for the most part, I have done that. I’m seeing someone too. I wish her the best in life. I really mean that. .

Besides, thanks to my X, there is a very good chance I’ll have an extra $1K a month in my bank account for the rest of my life. You can’t be mad at someone that helped you accomplish that feat for very long. Hell, maybe I should send her a bouquet of roses.

Then again, maybe I won’t.