5/31/2008

Famous Last Words

Down through history, when people are at their deathbed or facing the gallows chamber, they have been given a chance to say their last words on this earth. Most are not worth spending time to even try and figure what they meant. Some are noteworthy and have made their way into books, pamphlets, and, lo and behold, the World Wide Web. I have here today a few for my loyal readers to look upon and, as always, my lucid and carefree remarks. Without further adieu, let us open up the crypt vault door…


Well, gentlemen, you are about to see a baked Appel.
Executed in electric chair in New York.
~~ George Appel, d. 1928

Nothing like a little gallows humor on the way to the electric chair, eh George?

Thomas Jefferson--still survives...
~~ John Adams, US President, d. July 4, 1826
(Actually, Jefferson had died earlier that same day.)


Jefferson and Adams were mortal enemies in life. I defy anyone to tell me God doesn’t have a sense of humor..

Damn it . . . Don't you dare ask God to help me.
To her housekeeper, who had begun to pray aloud.

~~ Joan Crawford, actress, d. May 10, 1977

Mommy dearest, you needed all the help you could get on this earth.

They butchered me back there, I was in a lot of pain. They cut me in the groin; they cut me in the leg. I was bleeding profusely. This is not an execution, it is murder.
Executed by injection, Florida
~~ Bennie Demps, d. June 8, 2000

( It took execution technicians 33 minutes to find suitable veins for the execution. The executioners had no unusual problems finding one vein, but because Florida protocol requires a second alternate intravenous drip, they continued to work to insert another needle, finally abandoning the effort after their prolonged failures.)

So, Bennie, why were you in the execution chamber anyway? It wasn’t because you were a boy scout, was it?

Remember, the death penalty is murder.
Executed by injection, Texas.
~~ Robert Drew, d. August 2, 1994

And, Bob, remember murder is the death penalty. But, you already knew that.

You can be a king or a street sweeper, but everyone dances with the Grim Reaper.
Executed in California's gas chamber.

~~ Robert Alton Harris, d. April 21, 1992

Funny how murderers can wax so eloquently at death’s door.

Monsieur, I beg your pardon.
Spoken to the executioner, after she stepped on his foot.
~~ Marie Antoinette, Queen of France, d. October 16, 1793

Marie, if nothing else, you were polite.

I've had a hell of a lot of fun and I've enjoyed every minute of it.

~~ Errol Flynn, actor, d. October 14, 1959

You know, if you are honest, this is the way you would want to be remembered. You had fun and you enjoyed your life. Good for you Errol.

They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist. . . .
Killed in battle during US Civil War.
~~ General John Sedgwick, Union Commander, d. 1864


I assume General Sedgwick discovered that those Johnny Rebs were better marksmen than he imagined.

I see black light.

~~ Victor Hugo, writer, d. May 22, 1885

That’s not a good sign, Victor.









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